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8 Confidence Habits to Learn from Peaky Blinders' Tommy Shelby

Author: Charisma on CommandTime: 2024-01-07 07:55:01

Table of Contents

Exude Confidence with Relaxed Body Language

One of the first things you notice about Tommy Shelby is that he has slow, relaxed movements. When he isn't physically fighting, he's almost never in a rush. For example, notice how slowly Tommy moves and how it instantly gives you the sense that he's above feeling intimidated or pressured. When you move slowly and comfortably in situations where most people would feel stressed, it shows confidence and self-assurance.

Along with the slow movements, Tommy is also comfortable maintaining eye contact, even during conflict. He doesn't back down or look away when challenged. The key is not to force eye contact at all times, which can actually escalate tension. The goal is to know what your behavior signals. Hold eye contact to show confidence, look away briefly to de-escalate, or break eye contact to the side to diffuse tension without projecting fear.

Move Slowly and Speak with Conviction

Tommy's ability to command respect comes in part from his slow, relaxed physical presence. When you resist rushing or showing outward signs of stress, it signals inner confidence and self-control. Match this energy by speaking slowly, pausing between statements, and using declarative language that leaves no room for doubt.

Hold Eye Contact to Show Confidence

Maintaining eye contact, especially during disagreement or conflict, demonstrates confidence and self-assurance. Just be sure not to force eye contact at all times. Strategically break contact to prevent escalating tension, or shift your gaze to the side if trying to diffuse confrontation without compromising confidence.

Stay Cool Under Pressure

A huge component of Tommy Shelby's magnetism is his ability to stay cool and collected even during intensely pressured situations. He is completely non-reactive to hostility and threats, showing his confidence in handling whatever challenges arise. It's hard not to respect someone who keeps their composure when most would react emotionally.

Of course, the goal isn't to fake nonchalance while internally panicking. It's to cultivate genuine, deep-rooted confidence in your ability to handle unpredictable circumstances. This starts with managing your physiological response to stress so you can think clearly and respond intentionally.

Be Non-Reactive in Conflict

Tommy's confidence partially stems from his refusal to be reactive in the face of open hostility or disagreement. He doesn't raise his voice, get visibly upset, or otherwise feed emotional confrontation. Staying calm requires self-trust and inner stability. Reactiveness exposes self-doubt and lack of control.

Speak Slowly and Use Strategic Pauses

Beyond a relaxed physical presence, Tommy speaks slowly, pausing between statements. This composed, unhurried cadence pulls listeners in and commands attention. Rushing through speech exposes nerves, self-doubt, and lack of conviction. Take your time. Thoughtful pauses add gravitas.

Wield Power Through Carrot and Stick Motivation

One reason Tommy Shelby's quiet words carry weight is his adept use of carrot and stick motivation. He either knows what you desperately want and can provide it, or knows what you fear and can prevent it from happening. The key is understanding others' motivations and tailoring both rewards and consequences to align behaviors.

For example, if you want a promotion at work, outline what added value you can provide over the next few months, and get alternative job offers to use as leverage. This dual carrot and stick approach—offering enhanced value while also posing the risk of losing you—makes it much more attractive for your employer to promot you.

Build Real Confidence Fast

Charisma University's Proven System

While cultivating Tommy Shelby's unflappable poise takes time and self-work, you can develop significantly more confidence and charisma in just a few weeks using Charisma University's comprehensive emotional intelligence training system. Members have reported landing job offers, promotions, making new friends, and increasing self-esteem after going through the program.


Q: How can I move and speak slowly like Tommy Shelby?
A: Practice relaxing your body language and speech patterns. Move deliberately, hold eye contact, speak clearly in a lower vocal tone, and use pauses for emphasis.

Q: What does it mean to be non-reactive?
A: Being non-reactive means maintaining emotional control and not overreacting to conflict or hostility from others. This projects confidence and commands respect.

Q: What is carrot and stick motivation?
A: Carrot and stick motivation means incentivizing desired behavior with rewards (the carrot) while deterring undesired actions by threats or consequences (the stick).